Saturday, March 13, 2010

business casual court

so after 10 months of feeling like a completely worthless human being i have finally entered the workforce. that's right i am finally working at my dream job, the liberty medical call center. i have dreamed of this moment for most of my life. i remember when i was in second grade and i would just sit in my classroom and dream about the day that i graduated from college so i could begin talking to the elderly about medicare over the phone. finally, i have arrived. but for real this job sucks. i mean don't get me wrong i'm very thankful that i finally have a job i know it's not easy to find one these days but this just isn't how i pictured my life post college. i guess i thought i'd be doing something i cared about or i'd be saving the world or something like that. i guess that just isn't always how the world works. but i don't want to be a negative person so here is a little list of positive things:
1. i have a job
2. i sleep now
3. i'm moving in june so this job is only temporary
4. this job provides me with a lot of funny stories.

funny story #1

so, i'm about to begin week 3 of my 6 week training class. the training class isn't so bad because well i'm not really working. also, the woman teaching the class is basically the whore of babylon. on the first day of the class she had us go around the room and introduce ourselves. after this was over and i realized that for once i was the normal person in the room she went ahead and filled us in on the fun details of her life. "hi i'm laura, i've been working here for seven years. i have two kids, they are my international love children. one has a father from cuba and the other one has a father from albania i guess i'm only capable of procreating with communists. i'm very happily divorced and getting remarried in a double wedding in june." wow, my mind was blown. this woman just makes inappropriate comments all day long and lets everyone know about her nightly escapades at the penny arcade which i guess is some sort of casino-ish situation. they have free food apparently though. janice, the old lady from pittsburgh, let us know just exactly what food they served throughout the week.

funny story #2

laura, the class trainer, smokes so we get a lot of breaks. i usually just stay in the room during the breaks because i don't really want to make any friends at this place. i mean i talk to the two guys that sit next to me sometimes. carlos and jeff. carlos falls asleep a lot and usually snores. jeff also plans on leaving in june. but anyway whenever these breaks happen there are a few people that kind of just sit around and talk and i've had the pleasure of overhearing some pretty awkward conversations. my favorite was the one that they had about catching their significant others cheating on them and also how they get away with cheating. one guy in there told a story about how he came home late and his girlfriend thought he was cheating on her so she came after him with a sword so then he ran in his room and grabbed his sword and they got in a sword fight. who gets in a sword fight in 2010??? who are these people? anyway i've never felt so normal in my entire life. after that whole little conversation i stood up and said "i feel like i need to cleanse my mind" and then i walked out of the room.

oh and also after the trainer went on and on about her gambling i told the casino phil story and warned the class about the dangers of gambling.